[Editor's note - A huge welcome to new TWC poster, Stephanie I, who really, really knows how to fly with kids.] 

My son, F, will be three months old later this week.  Since he was born, he has flown three separate times.  He was born in New Mexico, so his first flight was on the way home, when he was three weeks old.  When he was seven weeks, we took a trip to visit family in Minnesota for a few weeks.  The first two days F flew, he went with me, my husband, and our almost three year old daughter, E.  As semi-experienced parents when it comes to traveling, neither of the two trips with my husband worried me that much – after all, there was one of us for each of them.  Still, the trip home from Minnesota was going to be just me, E, and F, and for that one, I was nervous about how the whole thing would go.  Here is what I learned:

1.  Cheaper isn’t always better - Minneapolis to San Juan, Puerto Rico is a long flight.  It just so happens that Northwest has a direct flight to San Juan on Sundays only.  Also, we totally lucked out because the flight was only about half full.  We actually left a few days earlier than I would have liked because taking only one flight, with the time savings and greatly reduced hassle, was worth it.  The cheapest flight, if it adds extra legs or time to your trip, may not be worth the savings.

2.  Lap or Seat - I think for safety reasons, it’s always better to buy your child their own seat.  But plane tickets are expensive!  We have done it both ways, and for me, it comes down to the child’s age.  I’d love to say we always buy each of our kids their own seat, but if we did that, we wouldn’t get to travel nearly as much.  So, when the baby is less than 8-9 months, I’m always happy to have them on my lap.  By the time you factor in nursing and napping, the baby spends most of the flight on your lap anyway.  For a 9-18 month old baby, there is NO WAY I would ever fly again with a child that age as a lap child.  The few times I tried it, it was miserable.  In our case, E wanted to move around and there was just no space to move around in.  She was always pretty quiet, but I was on pins and needles the entire trip.  Now, when my husband flew with me, it was a different story.  There was plenty of space and maybe you don’t need a separate seat.  Over 18 months, I’ve done it both ways.  With the extra seat, it was fine.  Without the extra seat, it was cramped, but by 18 months, E was old enough that I could entertain her with books, movies, and snacks.

3. What To Pack -  When I fly with kids, I always bring a carry-on roller bag.  It’s a bit of a pain to carry through the airport, but I need the space.  In the bag, I pack an extra change of clothes for everyone (including me!) just in case there are spills of one kind or another.  I also pack a full container of baby wipes, an extra blanket, and a pillow.  As a nursing mom, the pillow makes all the difference on the flight.  My favorite is a micro bead pillow.  The beads somehow mold themselves around the armrest and my arm and provide awesome support.  There is nothing worse than being stuck in one position for several hours and having it be a horribly uncomfortable one.   In the diaper bag, I put diapers for those who are still wearing them, a small pack of wipes, an empty water bottle and/or sippy cup of some sort (to be filled once we get through security), and handful of healthy snacks (avoid chocolate – if it melts or gets dropped, it makes a huge mess), and a bunch of books.  We got E an awesome airport book that always occupies her while the plane is still at the airport.  E also loves sticker books and will spend at least an hour pulling off the stickers, whether they are dinosaurs, planes, planets, or animals. 

4.  Entertainment - We got E an iPod – it’s the short, fat nano.  We also got her a pair of $8 headphones, child sized, and a rubber case for the Nano.  Before we leave, I load the iPod with her current favorite movies or TV shows (she watches them all on our computer at home) so that she has a few hours of mom-approved programming to watch.  This is usually good for an hour or two on the flight.

5.  Getting from the curb to the gate - For getting your child through the airport, I always, always prefer to use some sort of baby carrier.  The one I’ve used the most is our BabyBjorn.  It is very secure and I feel comfortable bending over.  I have several slings and pouches that I really like and used a lot when it was just E.  But when I was flying with E and F, I put F in the Bjorn so that, for example, when I was bending over the toilet to help E get down, I knew there was no way F would accidentally slip out.  Besides the gross factor, I would hate to have used our extra set of clothes before we even got on the plane.  The sling/Bjorn/whatever is also nice for holding the baby while you are flying.  On this last trip, F was asleep against my chest and E was getting very tired and whiny. I knew that if I held her, she would sleep but my lap was already occupied.  So, I loosened the straps holding F, sort of slid him over to the side, and hauled E on to the other side of my lap.  I was a giant pile of blankets and children.  Thankfully, I had my pillow so my arms were at least semi-comfortable.

At some point, you do need a stroller.  E is pretty light, so I was able to comfortably carry her until about 2 years but now, and now that I have F, we need a stroller.  The idea of a two or three year old loose in the airport makes me nervous, even now.  Still, I recommend avoiding the stroller as long as possible – it is bulky and continually slows you down.
As for the actual flight, well, there, you are on your own.  My hope is always that between the cool factor of take off and landing, the snacks, the toys, and a nap, we can fill up the time in the air.  As long as it doesn’t disturb the other passengers, I let E do or eat almost anything on the plane – for the greater good, you know.

6.  Getting from gate to car - This was the hardest part of the trip and the one thing I could not do on my own.  I had two suitcases, two carseats, and two kids.  Even with the best planning, there was no way I could get all that to our car and our airport does not allow people without tickets to enter the baggage area.  However, I have a great friend who picked us up at the curb and then drove us to our parked car.  So, after loading everyone in the car, we made it home. 

Oh, one last thought – I have hardly mentioned F this entire time.  Yeah, everyone worries about having a screaming baby on the plane, but in my experience, infants are easy when it comes to travel.  They can eat and sleep on the move and don’t require much entertainment.  It doesn’t get hard until they become mobile.  So, take advantage of that and travel while you can.  Strap on the baby, pack a small bag with a few changes of clothes and diapers and enjoy yourself.  

As for adding in the toddler, well, I wouldn’t recommend flying alone with two kids, but if you have to do it, you can make it work.